Quiet as a mouse

My roomate is a teacher and has been off for most of the summer, he is also a light sleeper. So on most mornings I get up before him and quietly pack up all my stuff for the day, and tiptoe out the door. Well when I say tiptoe I mean, I carry my very loud healed shoes to the front door before putting them on. I even walk in the grass instead of our walkway to prevent echoing footsteps back into his bedroom windows.

Today was no different in my description, with the exception of one tiny TINY detail. This morning as I reached my car to unlock it with my handy dandy "remote unlocker", (Yes that's a technical term), I ever so quietly hit the panic button instead....

*BEEP* *BEEP* *BEEP*!!!!!!

Ah well so much for trying to be considerate.

If only the holy spirit was a hit man

Recently Pat Robertson "famed" evangelical speaker, has been back tracking on comments he made about assassinating Venezuelan President Chavez.

"I didn't say 'assassination.' I said our special forces should 'take him out,'" Robertson said on his show. "'Take him out' could be a number of things including kidnapping."

I love old people. :-)

New Mexico...cleaner than Old Mexico

"A Mexican city at the heart of a raging drug war is trying to woo back jittery Texan day trippers by offering free bus tours with an armed police escort."

All good and well, smile everybody...until they shoot your police escort...then you might be fucked. I'm just sayin...

Four men and a little lady

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
Originally uploaded by whaala.

Recently I moved into a great house, with a great roomate, and well four men.....er....turtle men....er....mutant teenage ninja.....turtle.....uh men... Um yea anyway, you're totally jealous I can FEEL it.

I've been in the house now about 4 weeks, and really I don't even notice them anymore. Only at night when I turn out the lights and the small little glow in the dark stars come to life to highlight their AWESOME weaponary!!

Who needs creativity when you have real life like this I ask you?

Some Days

Some days you just feel awkward. Today I feel awkward.

What can brown do for you?

Make your day.

UPS guy: Sure is a nice cool day out there.
Me: Sure is.
UPS guy: It's suppose to be a lot cuter......UH! I mean hotter tomorrow.
Me: *smile* Yes, yes it is.

Thank you UPS guy. :-)

Destination Unknown as we pull in for some gas

Being in Massachusetts a year now, the subtleties of the people here are still not lost on me. This is what I don't understand... Why is everyone walking so fast? It's weird to me to watch people walk fast into work. INTO WORK PEOPLE. I mean ok maybe I can understand this in the dead of winter when it's 10 degrees out. But, people seriously it's Friday, it's 75 degrees out, and you're just DYING to get into your cubicle behind your computer screen, so that someone can walk by 5 times a day and check that you're there? So that someone can schedule a whole slew of meetings for you one after another in dark cold rooms? Seriously? STOP IT!

I don't get it....but apparently life is a destination in Massachusetts rather than a journey. (feeling alittle philosophical there, don't worry someone will knock me off my high horse later)

My reputation, it precedes me

What are friends for but to cheer you up mid afternoon sludge...

sam the mam
sam likes ham
sam gives no damn
sam drives a ram
sam's door goes slam
sam knows a girl named pam
sam says emerill says BAM
sam's car has a twin cam
sam loves her whole fam
sam likes toast with jam
sam's going on the lam
sam fought in nam
sam never ate a yam

\:D/

......I admit I really have never eaten a yam.....caught!

Mysteries of the Universe

Why is it that no matter what, if you attempt to contact your friends and family when you are bored, or in need of a chat, or a leaning ear, they are NEVER available. Your own mother isn't even available as she's out with the rest of your family enjoying social together time. Wassup with that? I HAVE NEEDS PEOPLE!!!! Very NEEDY NEEDS!!!

Why is it also that when you can't possibly pick up the phone, or talk for very long, or are SLEEPING...they all call, like out of the damn woodwork these people.

Ah well in the famous words of my mother "Life isn't fair Samantha, you may as well just get over it."

You can obviously see I haven't gotten OVER IT!

In which time passes

Recently I saw a Target commercial featuring the melody and hook from Sir Mix A Lot's famous rap song, "Baby Got Back"....

The commercial was for back packs....

Seriously?!

Sir Mix a Lot is a total sell out.

Law 398233940372899

If you have recently purchased a new Buick, you may NOT put a NIN sticker on it's bumper.

One of the many laws I would in fact inact if I was a small Korean man with complete and utter ownership of my own small country, with my very own small penis.......